"Welcome to Grammaropolis" Lyrics

It occurred to me, as I was thinking about Doctor Noize's excellent contributions, that it might be a good idea to post the lyrics of his song, Welcome to Grammaropolis.

The words come fast and furious, and the tune is nefariously catchy. The goal has always been for kids to want to memorize the song and thereby (perhaps without even knowing it) memorize the roles of every part of speech.

To that end, here we go:

Welcome To Grammaropolis
(Video Version)
by Doctor Noize, based on characters by Coert Voorhees

This is not that song!
So please don’t sing along! Hey!

Action Verbs are great words always making sure they’re heard
They animate the eyes on your face
And when they’re feeling transitive they hang out with the Nouns as is
And energize a person or place

Linking Verbs are sidekicks givin’ Action Verbs tips
Usually a form of “to be”
She says that “I’m a mellow yellow Cinderellow, not to say I’m jello --
Nothin’s really botherin’ me”

Well here’s a Noun that I’ve found on this grammar ground
Wrapped around a person, place or a thing
He likes to follow the Verb or Adjective word
Don’t mess around with the Nouns, ‘cause they name everything
Oh now everybuddy sing...

(Chorus)
Welcome to Grammaropolis
It’s such a tough metropolis
I think I am the awfulest
At Grammaropolis! Hey!
Oh grammar! Good grammar!
Oh grammar! Good grammar!
Oh grammar! Good grammar!
Grammaropolis!

I’m lovely, I’m bubbly, I’m kind and cuddly
I modify a Pronoun or Noun
What kind? Which one? How many? How much?
An Adjective is very profound

How, when, where, to what extent, under what condition
Will you tolerate the tone of an Adverb?
Adjectives and Verbs and other Adverbs say I’m bossy
But an Adverb isn’t really a bad word

They call me Preposition ‘cause I’m pre-positioned
To populate the start of a phrase
I got the map and the compass and I’ll kick your verbal rumpus
Into super high gear, lead you everyplace
Hey, I say...

(Chorus)

Thank you for writing a song about me, dear!
Gramma, it’s not Gramma-opolis…
Oh?
It’s Grammaropolis!
Oh!
But this is not that song!
So please don’t sing along!

Pronouns confound, throw the Nouns in the Lost & Found
They take their place, they’re hangin’ around
An antecedent gives ‘em freedom, so you’ll know ‘em when you read ‘em
Otherwise there’s chaos in town
We’ll do it for half what Nouns normally charge…

Who’s normal? What’s normal?
Who’s normal? How normal?

Gather ‘round, join in, when we’re together we all win
A little middle riddle am I
Conjunctions are a junction with a function, no compunction or dysfunction
Joining words and word groups, oh my!

And when it’s “Hey!” “Say!” “Wow!” Pow!” -- do not have a cow
Interjections are emotional birds!
And Mr. Slang rang words absurd, don’t tell Mom you used that word
Slang is when a poopee becomes a tur--
--Don’t say that!
Sorry…
...I’ll pretend I never heard
Thank you, Gramma!

(Chorus)
This is not that song!?!
Grammaropolis!

Vocals & instruments performed by Doctor Noize
Gramma's voice performed by Janette Cullinan
Produced by Cory Cullinan
Mixed by Cory Cullinan & Justin Peacock
Mastered by David Glasser at Airshow Mastering